The Woman Wooer Assessment
- A guy you are interested in is having car troubles and is disappointed because he had planned to go visit his family and they live two hours away. He asks to borrow your car. You:
a) Suggest he ask someone else
b) Lend him your car, with the knowledge that this is a one-time only thing
c) Fill up the car with gas, clean it out, give him the keys and say, “Have it back whenever.”
d) Say with a girlish smile and giggle, “You can borrow my car if you promise to pay me back somehow…”
- You eat at your favorite sandwich restaurant, having wonderful conversation. The server leaves the bill and he reaches for it while he reaches for his wallet. He realizes he only has $2 and says, “I’ll leave the tip, but do you mind catching this one?” You
a) Say, “Yes, I do mind. Why didn’t you check your wallet before we left?”
b) Smile coyly, wink, and say, “Anytime, babe, anytime.”
c) Tell him you have to use the restroom and run out while he’s not looking.
d) Force yourself to look sweet and say, “Oh, that’s no problem. It could happen to anyone. And put that money back, I don’t mind paying the tip! You drove, after all.”
- You and your guy are joking around in your kitchen. You are being silly and even having a tickle fight. In the middle of a burst of laughter, he looks at the clock and says, “Oh, I better get going. I am tired. See ya later” and walks out of your apartment. You
a) Pause a moment before running out your door and down your stairs, catching him just as he is getting into his car, breathlessly saying, “Are you mad at me?”
b) Stand there in shock for a moment before you burst into tears and then call your best girlfriends, telling them every detail of the situation.
c) Call him five times on his cell phone (he isn’t answering) before you finally leave a voice mail saying, “I don’t know what just happened. Are you mad at me?”
d) Shrug your shoulders, say, “That was weird,” and clean up the dishes, not thinking about it again.
- It’s 2:00 in the morning, and you have been snoring and drooling for at least two hours. Your guy calls and says, “I couldn’t sleep and was bored. I didn’t wake you, did I?” You respond by:
a) Saying, “Yeah, you did, but I can talk for a few minutes” …which ends up being 67 minutes before he hangs up, saying he is tired.
b) Yelling, “Leave me alone!” and then hanging up the phone
c) Saying, “Oh, I was awake! I was just writing you a letter and wrapping the gift I ordered online, special just for you!”
d) Not answering the phone, but letting your voice mail get it.
- It’s 11 at night and you’re dropping your guy off at his mom’s house (where he has been staying for the past six months). He flags you down as you’re pulling away to show you that his bags have been left on the porch. He asks if he can sleep on your couch for the night. You:
a) Roll down your window and inch, say you don’t think it’s a good idea, and speed off.
b) Tell him you don’t let guys spend the night, but offer to take him to his friend’s house.
c) Say, “No problem! You can even sleep in my bed and I will sleep on the couch. Hey, stay as long as you like.” You take him home, change the sheets, and whip him up a nighttime snack.
d) Hesitantly shrug and say, “I guess you can just for tonight.” You let him sleep on the couch. However, when you can’t find a place for him the next night, you let him stay again.
- You’ve been looking forward to this for a month, and tomorrow is the day. You and your two best friends bought front row seats to see The Nutcracker ballet. Your guy calls you around 10pm and asks if you want to go with him and his friends to a basketball game tomorrow. This is the first time he asked you to go anywhere with his friends. You:
a) Say, “Great! I thought I was going to be bored to death watching this ballet thing with Naomi and Kelly. Now I get to hang and with you and the guys. I can’t wait!”
b) Tell him you’re not sure if you can get off work, but you’ll let him know.
c) Tell him about your plans, but add that you would like to do it some other time
d) Say, “I have to go to this ballet thing tomorrow night, but maybe you and I can play some one-on-one later…if you know what I mean.”
- You’re mingling after your weekly Bible Study gets over, talking to a guy you met last week. He seems interested because he is involved in the conversation. What is the best way to get his phone number?
a) Twirl your hair in your finger, wink at him and say something like, “Maybe we can continue this conversation later tonight when I give you a call.”
b) Ask him flat out, “Can I have your phone number?
c) Make up an excuse such as: “Oh, next week I’m coming here from a friend’s house and I am REALLY bad at directions. Why don’t you give me your number just in case I get lost on the. You have a cell phone, right?”
d) You shouldn’t be asking him for his phone number in the first place.
- Your love interest says to you that he has been thinking lately about taking you out. He tells you he is considering doing so this weekend. On Saturday afternoon, you still haven’t heard from him. What do you do?
a) Call him and ask him when you are going to get together
b) Sit around and wait for him to call you…waiting…and waiting…
c) Make other plans and keep yourself busy; when he calls back, you kindly tell him he needs to call you and make plans when he wants to hang out with you
d) Go over to his house
SCORING:
Score your answers--
1: a=1 B=2 c=4 d=3
2: a=1, b=3, c=4, d=4
3: a=4, b=2, c=4, d=1
4: a=3, b=4, c=4, =1
5: a=3, b=1, c=4, d=4
6: a=4, b=2, c=1, d=3
7: a=3, b=3, c=4, d=1
8: a=3, b=2, c=1, d=4
Score your answers. If you got mostly 1s, you are doing well! You are not afraid to be open and honest, and are probably trusting God with your love life. If you got mostly twos, you may be afraid to be honest, and/or you are spending too much time focusing on your love life. If you got mostly 3s and 4s, I highly suggest you follow this blog. I am not an "expert" but am one who has been FREED from the chains of being a woman who woos. I spent years (too many to admit) being obsessed with guys and trying to figure out what to do to get a husband. It was when I finally gave control to God that I found JOY in HIS will, and not mine. Consequentially, he gave me a wonderful husband who pursued ME and loves God.
Whether or not you are certain that you need to be freed from the pursuit of men, I encourage you to read on. God put this on my heart to write, not only because it’s my own story of redemption, not only because it will open up your eyes to see that you are not alone, but one of millions who suffer the same, but because He wants to share His heart with you. He truly views you as his precious daughter and wants so much for you to expect the best from Him, not to suffer men who only want to use you. Also, consider the fact that it may be your duty, as a woman, to help change the face of our society as we fight to win back the concept of family as God created it to be. Ladies, I pray that, as you read this, God will open your eyes to the treasure you are. I hope this finds you laughing, crying, and wanting better for your life.
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